It is with such sadness that I write this blog today. It is not my intention to be Donna downer in my blogging, but after driving home today, I feel prompted to write about it. My heart is heavy at the loss of someone (that I indirectly knew) and only a year younger than me who chose to end life by suicide. I am not going to talk about this person directly, because I don’t know this person – but because this person was married to an older friend of mine’s child, it has affected me. I don’t know the circumstances. I can only imagine – but won’t speculate. But I will say, many things float through my mind, (as does the family, I am sure!), the first thought is:
What an ugly – ugly word that is: Suicide.
The question is why? What in life could be made so horrific, so immensely difficult, to say in short: I can’t bear it any longer…it’s over. Done. Finished, Over-with. Not fighting this fight. In fact the surviving spouse said it so eloquently; we (referring to the remaining spouse & their children) were not worth fighting for –
Now THAT is a kick in the head. To have someone intimately close to me say, you don’t love me enough to fight for me. Profound – yet incredibly – sad.
That thought leads me to yet another mind blower. Suicide is completely and utterly selfish. Does that seem harsh? It is though. This raced through my mind over and over again as I drove home. Could it be a person is too weak to face the problems in life? Most likely. But really, the person who doesn’t stop to say, “Self, there is this mountain of a problem, and I can’t face it; can’t do it; can’t face up to it. It is absolutely insurmountable, just cannot take the consequences, so I am gonna finish it all now.”, and not worry or think of the many people left behind who will miss you for the many years to come.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not judging, lest you walk a mile in my shoes, or I in yours!!! I really do have total empathy for those mountains of problems. I’ve had my share of them. We all know that set of problems that come our way that seem too big to tackle. Problems so large we cannot sleep, eat, or see past the issue at hand. Really, and honestly, when those problems are in our face – you DO want to run the other way – and it SUCKS!
When the caterpillar struggles to get out of that cocoon, it is DIFFICULT! But he pushes and shoves and creeps til he breaks through – and through that difficult time in that little fuzzy worm’s life, it becomes a radiantly beautiful butterfly that floats through the air.
The bible refers to our trials that we are refined like gold in the course of the process. Gold is valuable. It is pretty. When made into a ring, it goes through a refining process to make it shiny and desirable. Have you ever thought about the many people in the world who seem to have “made it” in life. Something about them is desirable and comfortable. If you get to know them, I bet they have a mountain story to tell, and coming through it made them comfortable which in turn makes others want to be around them. Life’s struggles really can make you – if you let them NOT break you. .
So, what is the answer and what is a person to do. The real answer. Are you really ~ really ready? Really ready? If you know me, you do know what I am gonna say. The only perfect answer to life’s problems, good or bad, is Jesus. He came that we might live – and not die. Because even in dying, we live eternally in heaven, with the Father, who is faithful every time we need him. God has the answers. But like anything in life, we need to seek after the truth. We need to put effort into it. We can’t sit back and say “Hey, yo Daddy, lemme have the answer”. Doesn’t quite work that way. We need to read the Bible. It has every answer to every problem, every time. We need accountable partners, spouses, pastors, close friends and family members that we can go to and be honest about things that happen. We need to be willing to listen – LISTEN to others pain, hurt or problems. We need to encourage each other in the Lord.
Proverbs 18:10 says the name of the Lord is a STRONG tower; the godly RUN to him and are SAFE. (my emphasis).
We should pray for the Lord to disturb us in such a way that we never look at things on this earth and to concentrate on these “things” or “self”, but to seek after the Life Giver, the one who holds all the answers we need. It’s not complicated; it’s us that make life complicated.
Jesus made it easy, so we can rise up as on eagle’s wings. To soar, not be subdued. Let’s look at life from His perspective and help others along the way and to look at everyone, even those who seem to have it “all together” and love them, encourage everyone, and give some hugs away – they are free!
Won’t you be a hugging life giver with me, so that no one in our sphere of influence will ever feel so lost that they would hurt themselves or others? Join me – today and make a difference in people’s lives! Let us live life to the fullest, and never let anyone feel like life is worth ending, help solve problems and not create problems.